Tuesday, March 2, 2010

A year in Review

I'm sure you're thinking I'm 2 months late in posting this. But I'm not.
Today We celebrated my little sweet angels first birthday. So last January and February I was still in a holding pattern waiting....until March 2nd...9 days late. If I'm honest she was much later in my mind as my first due date was February 11th and it was changed to February 24th. If you have had this, it totally sucks and you feel pregnant for way longer. I had a high risk pregnancy at 30 weeks as my I was hospitalized with my liver shutting down. But God is good and after 9 months of being sick. My sweet girl was born.
She is one of the funniest people I know. She loves music. Any hint of music and she's dancing. She'll turn her little music player on in her crib and dance herself to sleep. She wakes up with smiles and kisses and you can see her excitement to start the day. She loves to play peek-a-boo and thinks it's just way to funny. She loves our animals and walks after them all day calling them by their names. At 12 months she's almost walking full time and has a dozen or so words she uses and more she just repeats as she hears them. She loves her brother but is learning fast how to fight back and hold her ground. She loves all food (except boiled eggs...go figure) and has discovered how to feed the cats from her highchair. She brings me joy and makes my family complete.I hate to say I don't remember much of the year as I've struggled with post partum depression. And there is much I want to share regarding this illness. But it's not time yet. I'm still in the midst of discovering what God is teaching me in this difficult time. But God has given me this amazing girl to bring me joy in my dark days.
PPD is a terrible illness that I encourage any mother or anyone dealing with depression to seek help. It's absolutly not something you can just suck up and ignore. It's a real illness and needs real treatment. God has been carrying me and the verse from Jer 29:11, He knows the plans he has for me...NOT TO HARM ME....this has been how I've survived the last many months. God is Good all the time.
I've just starting meeting with a mentor and it's amazing. She challenged me this week to be thankful FOR ALL THINGS. Really all things, even PPD, even when my kids spill apple juice over the entire floor. Thank God for it, as hard as it seems and even pointless. Thank God for all things. Try and let me know how it goes for you. I'll let you know how it works for me. It's certainly put my focus on God today as I have been thanking Him for many different things that make me feel at my wits end.


  1. What a great post!! Raina is a doll...I love those cheeks!! And, I'm so glad that you are on the road to recovery. Love you lots girl and I'll keep praying for you!!

  2. Great post Tara...like Kerry said, Raina is adorable...I love her hair and those cheeks are so cute!! You truely are a blessed mama! God is good, ALL the time...even in the midst of darkness, He is there and He can take a dark, bad situation and turn it into good.
    Take care Tara!!

  3. I am so amazed at your openness and honesty. I am happy and proud of you for sharing PPD. I know that many women keep this kind of thing to themselves but I do feel you can help many more women just by opening up, it is "okay". God is good, all the time! God bless you!